


Choices

by dianamolloy



Category: Crimson Peak (2015)
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/M, Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-24
Updated: 2020-08-24
Packaged: 2021-03-07 01:08:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26088451
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dianamolloy/pseuds/dianamolloy
Summary: Thomas outside of the nursery goes over his choices while having the feeling of having none. Set before Edith walks in on Thomas and Lucille.Written with the prompt of ‘Trapped’ for a discord writing group.
Relationships: Edith Cushing/Thomas Sharpe, Lucille Sharpe/Thomas Sharpe
Comments: 12
Kudos: 20





	Choices

Hand hovering over the doorknob of the nursery where Lucille waited, Thomas was glued to the spot. Bravery had moved through his being when he’d pushed the wheelchair and asked Lucille for privacy and to be alone with Edith, tone firm and assured. More still at instructing his wife that she mustn’t drink the tea again, even if he could not tell her it was poisoned. And yet Thomas did not load the carriage and send her away, too cowardly to experience the cold fire he shared with Lucille after the rays of sun which Edith had shone at him; a true warmth without shame and confusion.

 _Never apart_ , that had been his and Lucille’s mantra, initially as children whispered by her in the dark and frequently through sobs of pain, and echoed by him once he was old enough to speak and understand himself. Even when they had been split after... after their mother’s death he had waited, not once had there been another, at no moment so much as considering such a thing. Thomas taking Lucille out of Westmorland as soon as he had been of age, despite the fact Lucille had been admitted as a permanent resident there had been a little money which remained to grease the wheels, James not quite managing fritter everything before his death. 

He loved her.

And Lucille knew best.

She knew that they could not be parted, cocooned together they had evolved as one being that could neither be alone nor survive without the other. Despite refusing to speak a word of what had passed in the years they’d been separated, Thomas knew Lucille relied upon him now the way he once had on her when they were locked up by Beatrice for days, giving him most of their meagre food so he grew strong while she wilted. She had endured so much to keep him safe and he owed her, Thomas _owed_ her he knew with certainty and even when it felt like a noose not willing promise, when he faltered, when his eyes momentarily opened and he faced what was uncomfortable and sought to take a different path she would be there to remind him of his duty. Of what she had sacrificed and lost, the visible scars that he would shy away from letting his hands touch only a sliver of the debt accrued against him.

He loved them both.

Thomas wanted to keep his Edith, to split his life between the day and the night. There would be no need for any more ugliness, no more shuttered eyes, Edith’s inheritance would keep them all until the mines opened, if only Lucille released him part-way. He could not lose his sister, nor could he bear to lose Edith.

Thomas wanted to believe his wife’s words that you could make choices, change and affect your own destiny. To march inside and tell, not ask, Lucille what would happen, to convince her that it would be for the best and that it was his turn to lead and no longer be passive to uglier deeds. He would do it, Edith would not die and together they would break the chains which held each of them. 

The humming began then, the melody which lived in his heart and soothed everything, which silenced the remnants of his soul that begged for action, for change, and Thomas took the door handle in his grasp and stepped inside. His physical eyes were open but inside himself his vision remained shut, protecting him, a somnambulist walking into a hell of his own making.


End file.
